Self Portrait

from A Carnival of Voices

I tried to frame my own self portrait
into a three-minute one-act play
But I'm a carnival of voices
it's hard to pin me down that way
without my subconscious saying
"I'm not in love with you,
but I'd be willing to make a change.
It's these profound fits of sunshine
that bring on subsequently rain."

"If I could make a suggestion -"
I say, `Oh, this should be nice'
"The middle ground is partly sunny,
Now take my good advice,
nobody's out here throwing rice yet
But me and the voices inside of your head
all agree..."

and I say, `Since we're all here talking -
You think I'm afraid of you?
Well, I'm afraid I think you're right...
I've never been good at crowd control
Your voices keep me up all night' `Now, I'm no psychiatrist
though I'm known for Freudian slips
I'd like to thank my Id and Ego
for the roller coaster trip
and if my memory will permit me
I'd like to remember to keep you voices
out of my head...'

Ellis Paul Music (SESAC) 1996